Dhoif Servant

Well, it hurts but that’s the truth. Finally today, I have decided to write about the truth that happened between James and I. So I somewhat forsee it’ll happedn. It’s just a sooner or later thing. So ya… I’ll accept everything that’s going to happen. Well if it’s meant for you, it’ll come back. Everyone knows that. I thought that I really love him. But I maybe wrong. Maybe. Things are even more complicated than I thought it would be. Nad is so nice to sit down after her shift and talked to me about everything. And I so agree with what she says. Im glad I had the chat with her. She’s right about James. So is Dzul. Sometimes I really feel so lucky that I have really good colleagues and a store manager. Work is seriously a place for me to distress from my sch work and problems I have at home. Honestly, I already have tonnes of problems to face at home. Having James adding to the whole thing obviously made it so much harder. But there’s nothing I can do now that it has happened. With more, I’ll just be a stronger person. BUT I really feel comfortable talking to Nad about the whole thing. I was angry, pissed, disappointed.. Just all mixed emotions. But i feel so much better now and i know what to do next. Just feeling more certain about everything. Im glad. Just so glad. This time, Im pretty sure what’s going on and NO regrets. NO regrets at all. All these will just turn you into a better person. Like how Hiday would put it, just maintain and enhance your self esteem. Like the Starbucks Star Skills. Ya.. helps alot..

I just have to consistently pull myself together and I know God will always be here. All these that’s happening is because of his will. Nothing else I would have to say but Allhamdulilah cos it has happened. I know I am a dhoif servant to Allah cos no one is perfect. There are times I miss prayers. Failed to perform my duties as a Muslim. There are even times I blame Allah for whatever that has to befall on me. I feel so ashamed and I abhor myself for my wrong doings. I will continue to have faith in Allah. He created me. All that I have now is because of Him. In any second, he can take away all of mine cos whatever I have belongs to Him. I’ll still have faith.

So today was such a long day. Since morning helping out at the Jalan Kayu Hong Bao giveaway to the senior citizens. Then at the SILRA Home at Buangkok Medical Park. Hon ding was there!:D So are the other YEC people. Like David, Nashrun, Afidah, Ding Fang, Daniel.. okay.. really alot. I really love doing community service work. At least I feel happier when I get to make them feel happy. Doing community service work have really changed my mindset. Regret to say I was someone who was quite narrow minded and just being so comfortable with the things I have. After I start going down for all those voluntary events, I some what become more aware of the people around me and all.. Learning to accept anyone at all for who they are. Regardless of race, language or even religion. We are all people. Still people. My dad has been in the grassroots for abt 10 yrs now. & seems like im following his steps. Gonna take social sciences and work in the public sector. Watch me be the next Prime Minister! too ambitious eh.. No I dont want to be the prime minister. More of psychology is what i would wanna do. So exciting! So next event! The next biggest one for YEC will be the Jalan Kayu Night Cycling. It’s a charity event. So cool! (: This whole part about raising funds and all just rocks!!

Starbucks Cathay is having a Chinese New Year steamboat on Saturday, 9 Feb O8, 2AM. AWESOME! Oh only baristas from Cathay SB are invited and all other attachment partners who are like part of us. (: Like, “eastpoint”!! Oh im doing till 1am that night. Not so bad(: So looking forward! YEA man! “eastpoint” was damn annoying today when he kept talking abt his ex.. Oh god. Like can someone shut him up? ARGH! But oh.. can’t believe he made me do coffee sampling ALONE. Like a noob walking outside The Cathay. At the box office. and the main entrance of Cathay. hah. so annoying. but oh. he’s quite nice at the end of it. I always learn something from him whenever i get to work with him. he’s awesome! (: Work was ok.. not so tired. Work is the only place for me to distress. Talking to customers and making them happy makes me happy too! At least I dont have to think abt the shits in life. & one best thing abt doing closing is to bring back FOOD! there were quite alot and feel so wasted to throw away.. They are FOOD. YOU WANT TO THROW AWAY FOOD? nono.. I wont. So i gave them to the security guard! I think he’ll feel hungry through the night. Gosh.. cant bear to just throw away those food. Ouch. IF i can have special powers to send them to Africa, I would. ): Haiz..

& one last thing. i hate the fact about random strangers who just happened to know agnotti and google-ing my blog or even my friendster.. & You start talking abt me. So totally whatever okay.. Some people just had to mind other peoples business. Too free with their own lives that they think they can take care of other peoples. GLHF huh… So annoying. Karma’s gonna hit right back at you. Seriously. GoodLuckHaveFun. oh. Pls do rmbr to watch out for your own lives too aye..